Your startup deserves feedback that hurts a little

You know what startup events are like. A packed room. Loud chatter. Big dreams. Everyone’s pitching something. Everyone’s hoping you’ll be the one who “gets it.”

Maybe they’ve just quit their job to give this idea a real shot. Maybe they’ve scraped together enough money to build a prototype. Or maybe they’re just looking for a co-founder, an investor, or a bit of encouragement to keep going.

But there’s something we don’t talk about enough at these events. Everyone’s being nice – but not always helpful.

When you ask a fellow founder, “What are you working on?” most people give you their best line. “We’re disrupting X with Y.” Or “We’re the Uber for Z.”

And you smile. You nod. You say, “Oh wow, that’s cool!” even if you have no clue what they just said, or who on earth would actually want it.

It’s not fake. It’s polite. We’ve been raised to be kind, not critical. We don’t want to burst anyone’s bubble. Especially when that person has taken a risk most people wouldn’t.

But too much politeness can do more harm than good.

Your idea is terrible

Not you specifically – but maybe. It’s entirely possible.

Some are half-baked. Some are clever but don’t solve a real problem. Some sound impressive but would never turn a profit.

And that’s not a bad thing. In fact, it’s part of the process. Most great startups begin with not-so-great ideas. They learn, they tweak, they pivot. That’s how progress happens.

But when everyone in the room is too polite to say, “Hmm, I’m not sure that would work,” we trap each other in a loop of false encouragement. People spend months – sometimes years – building something no one needs. That’s not just frustrating. It’s heartbreaking.

We’ve seen this exact thing happen across the industry

• We’ve seen founders spend thousands building a product before checking if anyone even wants it.
• We’ve seen pitch decks full of features but not one clear reason to buy.
• We’ve heard exciting ideas that fall apart the moment someone quietly asks, “How will this make money?”

But we’ve also seen what happens when someone does ask the right question. When someone gently shines a light on the thing everyone else has tiptoed around.

One example is a founder in our community, who had poured months into a direct-to-consumer app. But traction was flat. Instead of pretending everything was fine, they opened up to a mentor who asked the tough stuff:

• “What’s the actual value here?”
• “Who truly needs this?”
• “Could your tech work somewhere else?”

Those honest questions sparked a turning point. They didn’t abandon the mission. They just turned the wheel, pointed their idea towards a different market. One that actually wanted what they were offering. Now they’re growing, fast.

That’s what honesty does. It saves time. It sharpens your thinking. And it can put you on a path that actually leads somewhere.

Say the hard thing – but say it kindly

Being honest doesn’t mean being harsh. You’re not there to crush someone’s dream. You’re there to help shape it into something stronger. Think of it like this: if your mate is lost, you don’t yell at them for taking a wrong turn. You show them a better way.

At Stone & Chalk, that’s what we believe in: founders helping founders. Not just with contacts or coffee catchups, but with clarity. With honesty. With support that’s real.

So next time you’re at an event, don’t just smile and nod. Ask a better question. Share what you really think, with care. Because the kindest thing you can do for someone building a business isn’t just to cheer them on. It’s to help them see clearly. Even when it’s hard.

Behind every successful startup is a moment where someone told the truth – and the founder listened. That moment could start with you.